You are currently asleep in our bed because it is rainy outside and I wanted snuggles – the only time you stay still long enough to get snuggles is right before you fall asleep – I know this probably is looked down upon in most parenting books.
It’s absolutely mind boggling to me that you are about to celebrate your first birthday, that a year ago you were still a huge mystery in my belly (not really my belly but my uterus, but uterus does not have the same ring to it). We didn’t know what you looked like, would you be a girl or a boy, would you be funny or serious, calm or energetic, weird like your parents.
I remember a long time ago my mom said to me, that each time she thought this was her favourite age/stage with me, I would grow up a bit more and then she changed her mind and this was her new favourite stage – I completely agree. We just finished reading Peter Pan – the original story, not age appropriate reading but my favourite childhood story and still is – although very politically incorrect. I see the allure in never growing up, I have always had an issue with aging and no matter how many times I tell myself I should be grateful for each new year I get to see, that aging is a privilege not all get to experience, I still wish I had the ability to freeze time and take in the moments just a little bit longer. Part of the reason I write these blogs, is so that I have something that I can go back to, to read and remember – since some people have dropped the ball on creating time machines.
As it turns out you are exactly how I imagined you would be without knowing it. You are extremely curious, very cheeky, smarter than your parents – which is terrifying, you are a charmer and rarely shed a tear when in public because people can’t coo over you then. I have gotten use to the extended outing time so that your random fan club can fuss over you. You refuse to sit still because there is too much to discover and see, you hate going to bed because you aren’t done with the day yet. Your laugh does brighten the room, and you laugh a lot. Right now you are a total daddy’s boy. Mommy is there for goofing around and trying to teach you gentle (you are part cat), dad is there for snuggles and splashing in the water. You are an early riser, except on the days we can’t sleep-in – then you have no problems staying away with the fairies.
It will most likely take me two weeks to finish writing this blog, once you are awake there are adventures to be had, life to explore, giggles to create and memories (more for me right now than you) to imprint. Most days when you are napping, I have to adult, but what are rainy days for if not to embrace the laziness and calmness you feel when you get to hide out in your bubble.
We had your birthday, you are no longer a baby but now a toddler. There were homemade cupcakes (scary) and ice cream to celebrate, of course an afternoon at the beach – because what else do you do when it’s 38 degrees with the humidex (it’s a new term for me and my hair). An obscene amount of pictures to embarrass you when you are older, new toys for you to explore and wrapping paper – to each their own.
Like all parents we want you to be happy, to be a good person, to follow your heart and listen to your soul. I don’t see a career, a hobby or your life laid out for you. I want to be able to embrace you for you, to not influence you too much when it comes to your preferences in life – I mean it would be great if you shared interest in the same things as your parents, but if you end up being a super jock, at least we have Pops and your Aunty Lou Lou to help out. We will try our best to introduce you to everything, to let you continue to explore the world around you and the possibilities, and I will continue to dress you up – for as long as I can before you can choose out your own attire. There will be shitty things that happen in this life, we will try to instil in you methods to cope in these moments. We hope you continue to be the extremely happy and bright kid you are, to teach you and show you our morals, values and beliefs. If you decide a life of creativity is more suited for you, to encourage you and still make sure you take your education seriously. To explain that you can have an opinion but make sure you are educated on both sides, to try to see the other perspective and to respect and appreciate that it’s the differences that make this world interesting. To tell you what my dad always told me when I was younger… “it would be a pretty boring world if we were all the same.” You can’t make someone funny but I sure as hell will try, keep you wild, not too serious unless the situation demands it, to be respectful of others and also yourself, you are human and will make mistakes, you are our child so embrace the awkward moments, there will mostly likely be many. Laugh at yourself, find the humour in almost any situation, it will make things so much easier. Know yourself and follow your gut, listen, it is a dying art form. Ask a lot of question, but try to figure out the answer first yourself – yes there is such a thing as a dumb question. Stay innocent and young for as along as you would like, but know it’s ok to grow up (I will try not to pass down my Peter Pan syndrome).
I know this post is not riddled with my usual dry humour, but even I can have a soft side from time to time – it must be my Canadian side coming through.
One last thing, exciting news for us as parents – one more year and we can stop referring to your age in months.